It has been a little more two and a half months now since making a transition from a full-time position to a freelance/contract role. I threw myself into what I will now call outer space by leaving a position that I absolutely loved, but could no longer be a part of due to an inability to work so directly with a personality completely opposite of my own on an everyday bases. I still work from an office, but it is my own. I do not have to share a revolving desk, I choose my projects, and I create my own fires, as well as, put them out. I find myself taking all the things I loved about my old position and continuing to move forward with my task set similar. That could be my undiagnosed OCD or just my will to do what I love.
I am still struggling to get my bearings. I often question the next step and how I will get there with 2 little ones at home and one on the way I know I cannot fail. My ability to move forward supersedes the average person in my position. Have I let go of the idea of moving into another full-time position? No. When I walk into an interview 30 weeks pregnant do the “interview nerves” get to me? Not a chance. I can tell you I have never interviewed for so many positions and not got the job. The light in all of this is no one, I mean not a single person has questioned my ability to perform in a short term contract position with my protruding belly. At this point I see a brighter future coming from this new role and I find an exciting ending to this story.
I am finding a glim curvy road turn straight and lit with the sun. A brisk fall breeze. The kind of road you start to slow down and watch the red, orange and yellow fall leaves turn. You take a deep breathe in with your jeans and long sleeve shirt on and know the world couldn’t get any better. In the real world this is when daycare calls and you are only a block away. You can run your little into the doctor and be back to work in only 30 minutes. You can thrive being the answer to each problem for anyone you’re doing work with – knowing you saved the day for someone each and every day.
In my role I am not tied to a computer all day, no. Majority of the day some days, yes. What I am finding is this work style is nothing ordinary. I can be shaking hands with someone that inspires me in a whole new way or training myself to be better at what I do. I have time in this role to invest in people. How exciting is that?
Finding my path hasn’t been easy. I have learned a lot in just a short amount of time. Most who know me, will tell you I am driven and nothing gets me down. I do have to say one of my favorite girls in the world and my amazing partner have been victim to several conversations that have approached negativity at its best. What am I doing here? I want to give up. If I could give up I would. Does this road lead anywhere? In all these trials and tribulations I have focused on;